How to talk to your partner about sex

I spoke to husband and wife therapist team Caron Barruw (on instagram as @caronbarruw) and Glenn Barruw.

Caron and Glenn talked to us from a male and female perspective and as therapists all about keeping, finding or losing a relationship in midlife, menopause and beyond.

In this video we covered:

• Why communicating about sex is so hard for couples
• Why issues with sex might point to deeper emotional and relationship issues rather than purely physical.
• How men's libido changes through life and the impact of the 'male menopause'
• Why the 60s is fast becoming the most common age / decade for divorce
• Why listening is the key to communication and effective relationships.
• ...and why respect and feeling emotionally safe underpins good communication.
• How pornography can be destructive to sex lives.

Caron and Glenn shared some practical tools for improving communication within relationships too such as the concept of reflective listening - where couples repeat back what they have just heard from their partner before adding their own opinion. This ensures each partner feels heard.

Watch the full conversation here:

Why is it so hard to talk about sex in a relationship?

Why is it so hard to talk about sex in a relationship? Feat. Couples' therapists Caron Barruw and Glenn Barruw. We talked about: - how to improve communication in your relationship, especially how to talk about sex - why issues with talking about sex often mask other relationship issues - how to navigate conflict - how to feel more heard - the importance of listening and respect.

This conversation was full of professional tips and insights on navigating those midlife pressures and areas of conflict.

The pair have extensive experience as psychotherapists, where they take couples through intensive intervention programs to understand the jigsaw puzzle of peoples’ lives.  Over many years they have learnt what triggers people and why, how to change repetitive patterns and behaviours to ultimately build loving, effective relationships. 

About Caron Barruw

Caron Barruw moved from South Africa to New York and is a USA registered dietitian and qualified psychotherapist who has lived in London with her family since 1999. Caron now specialises in all aspects of relationship therapy - be that couples/ individuals/parenting/ coparenting/ siblings/ work issues/ marriage, divorce and separation. Changing relationships usually results in shifts - and anxiety, depression, mood changes can become an expression of these changes. The goal of therapy is to put together the jigsaw puzzle of your life so that you understand all the choices and situations that arise past, present and future. Taking back control of your choices leads to you feeling empowered to lead the life you want to live. Caron together with her partner / husband, Glenn Barruw (PhD behavioural psychology) - specialise in crisis couples. They work individually and do joint couple sessions to help couples move through crisis and establish different relationships. Find out more about Caron.

About Glenn Barruw

Glenn Barruw has lived in the UK for the past 20 years. Having trained in the USA, he has a PhD in behavioural psychology and specialises in male issues in both corporate and private practice settings. Glenn is now part of a couple that specialises in couples issues, intimacy, stress, and anger management. Glenn and his partner Caron Barruw give couples the tools they need to change the way they listen, hear and communicate with each other. After 25 years' working together Glenn is able to provide a 360 degree assessment of changing how people lives their lives - one conversation at a time. Find out more about Glenn.

Watch the rest of our 'Let's get intimate' series this February.

This event was one of a series of four FREE events we ran in February 2021 talking about love, sex, relationships and intimacy in menopause, midlife and beyond. See all the details for all of our events here.